Our mission · Since 2021

About EmberDate

We’re building the
opposite of a swipe app.

EmberDate exists because the best relationships don't start with a thumb — they start with a question worth answering. Our mission is to give modern singles the time, tools, and trust to turn a thoughtful first message into a story they'll tell for years.

Join EmberDateRead our storyWe’re hiring →
Value 01

Be human first

Every feature starts with a person, not a metric. We design for the moment your hands get sweaty before you hit send.

Value 02

Slow is the new fast

We optimise for fewer, deeper conversations. No infinite swiping. No chasing the next dopamine hit.

Value 03

Real, verified, kind

Every profile is ID-verified. Every interaction is held to a community standard we take seriously.

Value 04

Stories over stats

Our success isn't a swipe count. It's the wedding photos, weekend trips, and quiet Tuesday dinners.

Our Story

We started EmberDate because we were tired of the alternative.

The dating app industry built itself on attention, not affection. We wanted something different: a place where people who actually want a relationship can find each other without performing, ranking, or burning out.

EmberDate is privately held, profitable, and intentionally small. We answer to our members — not advertisers, not engagement charts.

12

Full-time team

30+

Cities live

0

Outside investors

  1. 2021

    A frustrated dinner conversation

    Co-founders Mira and Theo — both in their thirties, both fed up with mass-market dating apps — sketch the first prototype on a napkin in Tiong Bahru.

  2. 2022

    First 1,000 members in Singapore

    We open invite-only in Singapore. Within six months, 18 couples meet, six are still together today, and one is engaged.

  3. 2023

    Curation goes global

    Our matchmaking model expands to Sydney, Tokyo, London, and New York. We hire our first relationship therapists onto the product team.

  4. 2024

    100% ID verification

    Every member is verified end-to-end. Catfishing, in our community, becomes structurally impossible.

  5. 2026

    500K meaningful matches

    Today, EmberDate is in 30+ cities and has helped facilitate over half a million first dates that members rate “genuinely worth my time.”

How it works

Four ideas behind every meaningful connection.

Connection is a craft. Here's how we practice it — in the model, in the prompts, and in the ten-minute call you don't know happens between every match.

01Curation

Curated, not infinite

Members receive up to five hand-picked matches per day. No endless deck. No dopamine slot machine. The scarcity makes attention possible.

02Editorial

Conversation prompts that go somewhere

Every match begins with a thoughtful question, written by our editorial team and refined by the relationship therapists on staff. “Hey” is, by design, not an option.

03Research

Compatibility informed by science

Our match model blends self-reported values, attachment style, and behavioural signals — reviewed quarterly by a panel of relationship researchers we publish openly.

04IRL

Designed for the offline moment

We bake in date prompts, reservation partnerships in 30+ cities, and post-date check-ins. The goal is the meal, not the message.

Trust & Safety

Safer by design,
not by accident.

Safety isn't a feature we bolted on — it's the foundation that lets a real first message exist. Here's what we hold ourselves to, and what we ask of every member.

Community Guidelines

  • Be the version of yourself you’d want to meet.
  • Honesty over performance — even about the small things.
  • Consent is the baseline, not the goal.
  • Disagreement is fine. Disrespect isn’t.
  • If something feels off, tell us. We act.
Read our Safety TipsReport a concern

ID verification, not just selfies

Every profile passes government-ID verification before any match is shown. We rebuild the trust layer most apps treat as optional.

Behavioural moderation, 24/7

Trained moderators — humans, not just classifiers — review every flag within four hours. Our community standards are public and enforced consistently.

Privacy by default

Your photos are never shown outside the app. Your location is fuzzy by city. We don't sell data. We don't serve ads. Full stop.

Block, mute, report — one tap

Safety controls are surfaced in every conversation. Reports trigger immediate review and, where warranted, immediate removal.

Member Stories

Real people. Real first dates. Real chemistry.

Read all stories →
M

Maya & Sam

Brooklyn → Lisbon

“Our first conversation went on for 11 days.”

We were both burnt out on apps. The prompt about the last book that made us cry pulled an actual answer out of both of us. We met three weeks later. Married last spring.

K

Kenji & Priya

Singapore

“The verification gave us permission to be honest.”

Knowing every profile was real changed how I showed up. I stopped curating and just wrote like me. Two years in, that's still how we talk.

R

Rosa

Madrid

“I deleted three other apps the week I joined.”

Five matches a day sounded restrictive. Turns out, it was the first time I’d actually paid attention to one human at a time in years.

94%

of first messages get a reply

3.2x

more second dates vs. industry

12k+

couples celebrating one year

4.9★

App Store rating

The People

A small team building for a big kind of moment.

We're engineers, editors, designers, and one social psychologist on retainer. We're also all members. We use the product we ship.

MR

Mira Rajan

Co-founder & CEO

Former product lead at a Fortune 50. Believes the best dating product is one that gets you off it.

TL

Theo Lim

Co-founder & CTO

Ex-Stripe engineer. Spends weekends arguing about typography and pour-over technique.

AS

Anika Shah

Head of Trust & Safety

10+ years in policy and online community design. Wrote our first community charter.

JK

Jordan Keane

Head of Editorial

Built our prompt library. Former magazine editor. Will rewrite your bio if you ask nicely.

DV

Dr. Diane Vasquez

Relationship Researcher

PhD in social psychology. Reviews our match model quarterly. Her favourite book is ‘Attached’.

OM

Omar Mensah

Head of Design

Believes the cursor is a character in your app. Designed the conversation experience from scratch.

Remote, deliberate

Twelve people across six cities. We meet in person twice a year and trust each other the rest of the time.

Slow weeks, deep work

No-meeting Wednesdays. 4-day workweeks in summer. Async docs over status calls.

Dog-eared books

Every team member gets a books-and-films stipend. The reading list is internal canon.

Careers

Help us build the kind of dating app we'd use.

We hire people who care about the craft and the consequence. If that sounds like you, we'd love to hear what you’ve been working on lately.

  • Equity for everyone, day one
  • 4-day workweeks each summer
  • Annual team retreat (next: Lisbon)
  • Books, therapy, and curiosity stipend
  • Real health coverage, globally
  • EmberDate Plus, on us
Don't see a fit? Email us

Open roles

5 positions

Press & Media

For journalists, writers, and curious folk.

For interviews, story tips, or media queries, reach out to press@emberdate.com. We aim to reply within one business day.

Press kit (.zip)

Logos, screenshots, founder photos, brand guidelines.

12 MB

Brand palette & type specimen

Colours, typography, voice and tone reference.

PDF · 2.4 MB

Founder & team headshots

High-resolution images, with usage notes.

ZIP · 38 MB

Recently featured in

Vogue

Feb 2026

“The dating app for people who’d rather be reading.”

WIRED

Nov 2025

“EmberDate is what happens when designers actually use the thing they make.”

The Cut

Sep 2025

“Five matches a day. Genuinely good ones. We’re sold.”

TechCrunch

Jul 2025

“A profitable, bootstrapped dating company — in 2026.”

VogueWIREDThe CutTechCrunchFORBES

FAQ & Support

Questions, answered honestly.

Can't find what you're looking for? Our team replies to every message within one business day — and our help centre is genuinely useful.

Email support

support@emberdate.com

Safety tips

Read the safety center

Why curated matches instead of unlimited browsing?

Because attention is finite. We've seen, in our own data, that members who consider five thoughtful profiles a day end up in more first dates — and far more second dates — than members on swipe apps. Less, slower, deeper.

How does ID verification work?

Every member submits a government ID and a live selfie at signup. We verify both via our identity partner; nothing about your ID is stored beyond a verification flag. No verification, no profile, no exceptions.

Is EmberDate inclusive?

Yes. We support every gender identity and sexual orientation our members share with us. Our editorial and prompt design is reviewed quarterly with members across our community to ensure no one feels like an afterthought.

What does EmberDate cost?

EmberDate is free to join, with an optional Plus tier ($16/mo) that unlocks bonus prompts, conversation insights, and partner reservation perks. We do not run ads. We will never sell data.

How do I report someone?

Tap the ⋯ menu on any profile or conversation and choose Report. Our trust team reviews every report within four hours. Serious violations result in immediate removal and, where appropriate, escalation to authorities.

I've found my person — can I delete my account?

Absolutely — and we'll cheer you on. Settings → Account → Delete. Your data is permanently removed within 30 days, no dark patterns, no ‘are you sure?’ gauntlet.

Become a member

Ready for a first message worth replying to?

Create a profile in under three minutes. Get your first curated matches tomorrow morning.

Create your profileStill have questions?